Re:

"Hi Jenny,

So my strange life takes another turn. And does it? I have to tell you now, even though I feel a bit out of my mind.

The whole week in the little village by the Volga was an adventure, a pleasurable breathing space I think. I have not told you about it, but what is there to tell? It's so un-interesting, and at the same time so important. Sitting at night listening to the BBC via the internet with a new friend, thinking about the lines in the wood at the deck of a fishing boat. The strange feeling of sitting at a table at night with someone you really don't know, the family I am staying with. (I wish I was a fantastic person, making everybody feel great. And then, again, I sit there, talking to strangers and feeling so great myself. Maybe they feel the same. Maybe this is fantastic. I doubt my own perception, tenfold.)

And so I said it. I doubt my own perception, and I am out of my mind. But still: At the street of the village, in the middle of the crowd, I suddenly felt dizzy. I was together with my new russian Friend and we were talking about nothing in particular. Then she started looking at a poster and we stopped for a second. And I see him, that Norwegian friend of Andrew's. Just in a flash, and I instantly thought I was wrong. But there was this feeling of having experienced something important and scary. And I am not sure what happened at all, exept that I saw that man. And he saw me. His stare was like this: I know you have seen me, but it doesn't really matter.

I told them where I was and that I just needed some space. Philip answered me, nice and irritating. That was a mistake, now I lost even my mind. I will have to leave my little Russian town. Now.

Thanks for listening. And thanks for telling Simon. Somehow that comforts me. That's more important than you know. What would he say about imaginary stalkers?

Love another way,
Ira."